Discussing Autism

Just after Little Pickel fell asleep on the couch this evening (yes, he finally sleeps…thank you Pfeiffer) I flipped the channel from the Tivoed Ice Age to Extreme Home Makeover. I was surprised to see the O’Donnell family, a family who have 6 children; 5 of whom are on the autism spectrum.

Jeanette and Patrick O’Donnell were overjoyed by the arrival of their firstborn daughter, Caitlin Carole.

But 2 1/2 years later, their baby girl still wasn’t speaking. Then the O’Donnells received a frightening diagnosis: Caitlin was autistic.

The O’Donnells thought that if the condition was genetic, they wouldn’t have anymore children. But they say that doctors assured them autism was not passed down from the parents’ genes.

The young couple resumed their dream of having a big family. Along came Dierdre, Erin and Meaghan. They were a happy family, but then Erin stopped talking. Once again, doctors made the painful diagnosis: autism.

“By the time Erin was diagnosed, we already had four [children],” Patrick said.

And, one on the way. And then the 6th child came along. The disheartening story is that one by one each child received a diagnosis. Each one was different. Each one was difficult to handle. Each one was most likely another blow. Undeniably…genetics plays a part, not vaccines.

I was talking with a friend the other day about how the spectrum, how autism, affects each child differently…how each child has their own quirks, their own idiosyncrasies. She agreed adamantly, as her son hates noise while my son seeks it out. Her son hates movement, mine loves it. Her son is a great sleeper, mine horrible.

Caitlin, 14, and Kiernan, 4, the eldest and youngest, are the bookends of the O’Donnell family encyclopedia of autism. They display hallmarks of the condition — they walk on their toes, their bodies rock, arms flap, they often screech. Both are profoundly disturbed by certain environmental changes.

But, on the other end of the spectrum, Erin and pat are very verbal and can describe feelings. However, both are still very sensory stimulated. They both need sensory calming and are both sensory frightened by things.

And then there is Dierdre, the “quirky” one. She has a form of autism called Asperger’s Syndrome. People with Asperger’s will become obsessed with one particular subject.

“They’ll go on talking about a topic of interest to them and not take any cues from you that you’re not interested,” Amaral said. “You still have at the core this deficit of social function.”

Jeanette said it’s painful for Dierdre to sit with the family and eat dinner. She prefers to eat alone, one item at a time.

It certainly takes a special mother and father to raise these children and I give them all the credit in the world. They have obviously done a fantastic job getting to know all of their children’s quirks and needs. Kudos to parents who know how to truly parent. And kudos to EHM for helping them keep their home.

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